Saturday, February 22, 2014

Sat. Feb. 22 - Still HERE :)

Well, we're still HERE. I have to admit we're getting a little sick of these same 4 walls. Sometimes I still find myself shaking my head that we're even here at all. But as always, our eyes turn back to our God, knowing He has a plan.  Derek's condition is the same, nothing new. We feel close to going home, but have a few more days here...with these same 4 walls...sigh.

It's hard to imagine what the days ahead will be like, especially when we get home. That almost seems like a whole other journey in itself. It's going to take Derek a long time (like months) to recover from this. We're not sure what the future holds for his health, his job, our new home, this baby arriving in 5ish weeks; there are a lot of unknowns for us right now. I guess there always are those unknowns out there though...we sure never saw this coming. We talk a lot about 2 days before he got sick, and one day before or even just the month before when we closed on our new house. It's just strange to look back and think we had all these plans...and this whole storm was just waiting for us. I'm not sure why or who or where this storm came from...nor do we even care. The truth is that we have a Savior who loves us and carries us and is "...our refuge and strength, an ever present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea..." Psalm 46:1-3. We have hope, a real and living hope, who loves us more than we even love ourselves. CRAZY, right?

Actually, I'm sure to many of you, we do sound crazy...a little over the top about all of this God stuff. But that's ok, this is who we are and what we believe in. Many of you reading this know Derek and I from way back, back in the days before God was even part of our vocabulary...lol. Clearly a lot has changed since those days...but in our eyes, we're still the same kids from Boone Grove and Bremen. Our entire personalities didn't change the moment we gave our lives to God, and we haven't forgotten who we are or where we came from. All of that is a part of who we are and what God has used to make us unique new creations in Him. I heard a Pastor say once that our pasts may "explain" us, but they do not DEFINE us. We are defined by our savior, Jesus Christ...and His perfect life...and that's a relief (especially if you know anything about me or Derek)!

We're just people that felt the tug of God on our hearts, and by His grace, we're giving it ALL to Him. I can still remember reading those verses in Romans that God used to make me His own...I remember reading these verses and crying out to God to show himself to me, to change me. And HE DID. And that is how, in this situation, I know nothing can separate me from his love, nothing and no one can stand against us and win. The battle is already won in My Jesus, no matter what circumstances life brings our way.

"If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all--how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? ... Christ Jesus, who died--more than that, who was raised to life--who is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? ... No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:31-39

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