Tuesday, March 29, 2011

something new

i was thinking today about how precious life is, and how thankful i am to God for the little things.  there has been so much going on lately that sometimes it seems overwhelming.  but when i take the time to slow down, sit back and take a look at our life, i'm amazed at how blessed we are. 

we live in a home that's practically a mansion when compared to how the rest of the world lives...seriously.  there are so many people out there struggling and hurting who don't have homes or food, little babies out there who don't have mommy's to hold them and rock them to sleep.  and i get caught up in moments of frustration because my cell phone keeps shutting off or inpatient because we don't have cable or satelite tv anymore and have to sit thru commercials.  seriously? 

about 6 months ago God started working on me a bit (and derek too) and started softening us to what's really going on in the world, and in our own hearts for that matter.  we were introduced to a ministry that is helping orphans in Uganda...and since then, i've actually been crying myself to sleep.  just hurting for those little babies out there who don't have anyone to offer them a little kindness, let alone the love and acceptance that kids need to survive.  i tell my little rowan that she's a good girl, that i love her, that i'm proud of her, that i miss her, and i tuck her in bed every night and hold her because she says "mommy snuggle me". and it breaks my heart that there is a 2 year old right now, without a mommy, putting herself to sleep on a concrete floor, with no blanket, no hug, and just trying to stay out of the stream of urine that's puddled nearby.  this is something that is serious to me now.  the cable tv and newest most fabulous cell phone doesn't really seem like a priority anymore.

i keep finding myself asking the question...what's really important?  is it the american dream?  the really nice house, decorated and finished off to last linen, towel and night stand, the expensive crew crab truck, designer clothes, or our kids having every toy and item of clothing we deem necessary?  necessary?  hmmmmm.  that word just sounds so different to me now. 

well, i am so thankful to God and praise him for what he's showing us and working in us.  we have this desire to change our lives and to help others, and i have to say, it's a first for me in my 33 years.  it's the first time, even as a believer, as someone who loves and lives to honor God, that i've actually sat back and saw things thru eyes that are a little less self focused.  i know i don't usually write stuff on our blog about our personal/intimate lives...i usually just keep it light hearted and all about the kids.  i just wanted to put this out there.  it's the most exciting thing, the thing we're most proud of at this moment. 

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